Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Killing off incidentals

Killing off incidentals


Writing magnetic poetry
On a child’s blackboard
That I found in a dumpster.

 And then sometimes I get really high
 and Light a long filtered smoke, Thompson style.
And I exhale so hard until I am practically breathless,
In hopes that God himself will procure cancer
And beg for our help…

Not to see who does and does not run to his side
But to see him fall

‘Cause if he falls, it proves he is only human after all
But if we see no crash, no landing
Perhaps it means we ourselves are not human at all
But only animals chasing our tails…

A sinful whisper traveling the land from ear to ear
Like an underground telephone game.


 I get back into the poetry
Struggling to make things fit in my head.

Using someone’s chosen cookie cutter words
To create what I have been screaming
For years.
Could drive a nice girl like me insane,
Mad even.

And there are never enough words
And there are always too many words
No validation, just a mindfuck
And finding yourself into another pissing contest with yourself .

I peek out the window now and then
In search of a miracle crash
But it is disturbingly quiet.

Then I light another smoke,
And blow smoke rings off into the sky
Like carrier pigeons sent to scream sickness and chaos,
and disturb that unsettling  silence.

And I think I am doing this all
In hopes of creating
My very own miracle

But no crash landing has happened

Suddenly, Optimism crawls up on me
Like an unwanted child
.
As I think of the results
On the pool on god’s fall,
He’s dropping back in the race
No gloves up at all in sight
I’ve got the upper hand,
The angle

And now the words on the chalkboard flow
Like William Taylor Jr’s sweet never-ending glass of wine.

The silence is gone,
Replaced with screeches, natural disasters, and bells from those carrier pigeons
Letting me know their task is done.

And somehow, now everything makes sense.

Time to get high again,
And search for a vowel on the chalkboard.
My black smoke rings
Dance around in the sky
like a good old fashioned
SOS.

Please be on the lookout for my forthcoming book from Interior Noise Press. No date set, because apparently I have become a lazy asshole. Shocker.




                                          


comments and hate messages always welcome.





Monday, December 16, 2013

These are the hands

Keep your eye out for my new book on Interior Noise Press. I have not yet set a date because I am lazy and irresponsible.



These are the hands





When you cant get much lower
 You want to build a ship
To sink


Rocks in your pockets One for each sin

That you forgot to cross your fingers for



The tin man

Invented the snow flake

Huffin the silver stuff

On the back of a city bus


I want to hitchhike

In dark desolate areas

And


I feel like a bar fight


I think I knew from a very young age that these would be the hands of either a writer

or a killer


and I still think I should have taken the easy road.

                                                      



Thursday, September 19, 2013

You take the forest, I'll take the moon

Thanks for stopping by my blog. Comments always welcome. Be looking for my next book out on Interior Noise Press early next year. Date not yet announced! 



You take the forest, I’ll take the Moon


Too much buzz buzzin’ in my ear lately
About leaving a light footprint

Me?   I’m putting on my steel toed boots,
And  stompin’ as hard as I can
Down my dark and windy path.

My footprints will be so deep, so thick,
It will look as though I bounced off the moon
With each and every step.

I like that!
Me doing twists and turns in the sky
And having space (literally) between those beneath me.

The blood red moon has always grounded me,
 the same way fools follow
 that sacrilegious and unholy north star.

Nonetheless, I find myself bumping into trees
Knocking myself out, only to wake up
Forgetting where I’m going
And never liking where I am at,
It’s my curse and I accept it.

And a lot of you hypocrites that preach about “going green”,
Fill your SUV’s with gas, and head over to Costco
To buy large quantities of “green” paper towels, laundry detergent, diapers,  (cause you are all breeders)…tampons, deodorant, herbal remedies…
And anything else you can think of.

And they clog up the landfills
The exact same way
As the cheaper stuff bought at the dollar store.

Green Green Green
I’ve been forced to pledge allegiance to a country
I have never believed in
I have seen horrible wars started by “my” people
And hung my head in shame.

So, the only green I see are Dead Presidents
You know the ones who all started
These never-ending wars…

Tread lightly, and go green
If you wander into my path somehow,
 Don’t be surprised
To see me quickly bounce down for another hard stomp
Sparkling of moon dust
With a pocket full of stars.
Stomp, stomp. Stomp

Because my dreams
Do not come
From bumper stickers.





Tuesday, August 27, 2013

90 Meetings in 90 days




I was flying low

Headed for a crash



I didn’t just kick the shit

Like all my hip friends

I did another drive thru lobotomy.



Watching and feeling the junk

Leave your body

Is a gross inventory Real horror show like

  The problem, I’m told

Is that My roof (repeat)
is apparently on fire

and these mother fuckers think they have the right cocktail
to put the thing out


I say let it burn



But I signed away my rights

When I walked thru the

One way door.



I’m a veteran here

So they just throw me back in the trenches

And I can smell feces Smell gunpowder And hear dirty jokes
Like my second tour of Nam



My marathon thru Institutions is lengthy And some might even say Impressive:


Children’s homes Foster homes Juvie
Rehabs

Mental hospitals Free VD clinics Housing projects Jail
And


From anywhere

To anywhere

On a goddamn Greyhound bus



I didn't get

The  I love myself
 Jacket this time
But my own red dragon

Reared its ugly head And it was wearing Too much red lipstick


90 Meetings in 90 days the big book
the 12 steps

a higher power slap it all together
and feed it to the masses

with nicotine and coffee and what you have is possibly


the most brilliant pyramid scheme ever
but all these people are selling

is a shiny new you


cause “you’re not well”

and “you need to get better”

and “if you take one more drink you’ll die” and I wonder if they know how fucking thirsty I am


you’re useless if you aren’t producing
consuming procreating
goddamn its frustrating

and a little ironic that my refrigerator
is exactly 12 steps away.



But in here

Life is simple



Put me in a room full of

Crazies and drug addicts

And I feel the spotlight in my eyes



And it’s like I’m a debutante Claiming my white trash heritage And somehow I feel like
I've finally fucking arrived!



Thanks for stopping by my blog. interruptions  in life, but I'll always come back

     Do not forget that my new book will be coming out probably  early next year on Interior Noise Press.








Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Behind me Now

Thanks for stopping by my blog, and keep it classy San Diego! Don't forget new book coming out on Interior Noise Press. No date set yet  check them out here:  http://interiornoisepress.com/
if Dave has published, it is GOOD. Recommend JJ Campbell.





Behind me now





I play jump rope barefoot

amongst the tossed razors and syringes

and once I used a Ouija board to find out who he really was

inside of me.


I lost my echo

when I checked the pulse and found my shadow when I discovered that wine came in a box.

I caught a tiger by the toe once, and his teeth were like the needles I’d later fall in love with.

My mom would cut my peanut butter sandwiches into triangles

I would try to invent a potion that would make me a mermaid.

I could roller skate better than anyone else my age but when I turned tricks
everyone looked the other way

No one ever told me not to swim in the deep end and no one told me that I could never be a mermaid. These things you learn early in life

stick to you


Like the gum my cousin put in my hair when we all went to Six Flags.
I stood on my sand pail

and tried to hang myself with that jump rope once, but all I got was a scratched knee

and failure and sadness

that would stay with me forever

as I realized that sometimes there really is no way out.


Prisoners act like prisoners

and I feel like I should be singing the blues Put shackles around my ankles

and perhaps my behavior would make more sense.



I just wanted you to know



That  I still want to be a mermaid

And that jump ropes


Ain’t good for a hangin’.



                                                

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

brand spanking new poem..tonguing the wound

Thanks for stopping by my blog! Next book coming out on the awesome Interior Noise Press. No set date as I am still reassembling my brain...

newest poem, first one I like a whole lot in a little over a year, please share any comments good or bad!





Tonguing the wound

My hatred
Is changing
Making things grow
From the blackened barren ground

Containing soil which I spent hours upon hours digging
Those around me thought I wanted to plant a seed
I simply wanted to hide a bone
But no suitable soil was found

My love
Is forgotten
The word itself written on a piece of paper
A thousand times over
Then crumpled and used to light my last smoke

As I walk my veins throb
Hurting
For a good old fashioned
Bloodletting
The aforementioned ceremony to be attended
By only the finest self-appointed priests, healers, and snake handlers

But when I finally managed to get this pen to paper
To tongue that red swollen mouth wound
The words fell out
Only to shape the notes I wrote into the
Devils chord

And I can’t help but think
None of this would have happened
Had I kept my lazy crazy eye
On my rented out red right hand.

A bone would come in handy right about now
I think where I messed up
Was by not cauterizing the wound
After the big show

In fact a fire
Might have saved us all
From myself.



                                                        

Sunday, July 7, 2013

One of the most influential poems of my writing "career"

I'm bringing back the blog, it never really left. I just left. Nothing to be too concerned with, just a temporary complete loss of my mind.... read this poem, do it
(Still have a book due out on Interior Noise Press...genius takes time)



Lineage

Jeffrey McDaniel

When I was little, I thought the word loin
and the word lion were the same thing.
I thought celibate was a kind of fish.
My parents wanted me to be well-rounded
so they threw dinner plates at each other
until I curled up into a little ball.
I've had the wind knocked out of me
but never the hurricane.
I've seen two hundred and sixty-three rats
in the past year, but never more than one at a time.
It could be the same rat, with a very high profile.
I know what it's like to wear my liver on my sleeve.
I go into department stores, looking suspicious,
approach the security guard and say
what, what, I didnĂ­t take anything.
Go ahead.  Frisk me, big boy!
I go to the funerals of absolute strangers
and tell the grieving family: the soul of the deceased
is trapped inside my rib cage
and trying to reach you.
Once I thought I found love, but then I realized
I was just out of cigarettes.
Some people are boring because their parents
had boring sex the night they were conceived.
In the year thirteen hundred and thirteen,
a little boy died, who had the exact same scars as me.